Yesterday’s post shared the idea of counselling in a book. Check it out here if you missed it… Love is a Choice
This morning, waiting in my inbox, was the regular email notification for the weekly podcast I follow faithfully. The content is always interesting and helpful, on a variety of topics. Today’s topic was especially meaningful on the heels of yesterday’s book. The timing couldn’t have been more perfect, the two books fit so well together.
The subject line of the email was an attention grabber.
A specific type of writing that will combat anxiety, depression, and symptoms from past trauma.
There was no way I could walk away from this podcast and leave it for another day. It had to be today. I watched it twice, it was packed that full. .
Today’s interviewee has written a book called The Power of Writing it Down.
Part of author/writing coach Allison Fallon’s target audience is the same crowd flocking to read Love is a Choice... Count me in.
The Power of Writing It Down: A Simple Habit to Unlock Your Brain and Reimagine Your Life
Partial Amazon synopsis:
For anyone who’s trying to make sense of their life, who wants to get unstuck from the patterns that hold them back, hear this incredible news: everything you need for the freedom you want is entirely within reach. This practice and pathway is free, it’s readily available every day of your life, it takes just minutes of your time, and anyone can do it.
Author, writing coach, and speaker Allison Fallon’s life transformed when she discovered the power of a daily writing practice. As it turns out, using your words is one of the most powerful means you have for unlocking your life. The Power of Writing It Down is your guide to this transformative tool available to us all. In as little as five to twenty minutes a day, scientific research shows this daily practice can help you:
Identify your ruts and create new neurological grooves toward better habits
Find fresh motivation and take ownership of your life
Heal from past pain and trauma
Relieve anxiety and depression
Contextualize life’s setbacks and minor frustrations
Live a more confident, balanced, and healthy life
…and so much more
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In the podcast interview she explains Expressive Writing well and mentioned that the writing talked about in her book is not regular writing and it’s not journaling. It makes a lot of sense.
The idea is to write down your deepest thought and feelings. I have experienced what she means when she says this type of writing accesses the subconscious part of the brain where the conscious is often not allowed.
This is basically what I do when I write my this and that posts. What comes out is often a surprise. With some of the posts, like I mentioned at the time of writing them, I was in the midst of angst and felt so much better when I was talked out. To really get into it, though, I expect most of it would not be something we’d want to share publicly.
I recommend listening to the interview before reading the book. I’m glad I did because hearing and seeing her will make the words on the page that much more real.
Practicing this form of writing will be helpful to everyone, not just the most broken among us.
Here is the link. Enjoy, and buy the book if it makes sense to you. I think you will be glad you did.
I haven’t been as intentional with this type of writing as is encouraged in her book. From ignorance, really. I want to try it her way, to see what the difference will be in my life.
The level of professional counselling we need is sometimes not easily found. That was the case for me a decade or two ago and this book was a life saver. It was written as a joint effort by the Minirth/Meir group, both of them psychiatrists, joined by a third person, a psychologist.
The book starts off talking about codependency. That’s not the way I remember it from my first reading. It’s funny how that goes. The parts I remember are the ones explaining what happened to me, how it has affected me, and the broken way I do life as a result. Understanding opened many life changing doors in my thinking.
Of all of the many books I’ve read this one was the most comprehensive and impacting. It was written to be a counselor to those without access to one. It covers the subject well enough to be a textbook written in layman’s terms.
I’ve shared this book here before but feel inspired to share it again.
I was speaking with a long time friend today, catching up on our lives and families. Stuff happens in our families and sometimes there is brokenness left undiscovered for decades.
I’ve been thinking about our conversation for most of the day and tonight remembered about this book that could be helpful in their situation. So, this is for my friend, to share as she sees fit.
It’s for you too (as reader) if this would be helpful in your life.
One more comment. I remember interpreting the title and certain phrases in the synopsis in a negative way.
Reality was nothing like my expectations. Supportive, kind, understanding, helpful; these are all words I would use to describe the experience. And, validation.
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Love Is a Choice: The Definitive Book on Letting Go of Unhealthy Relationships
Amazon quote:
Let go of unhealthy relationships with the book that more than 850K people have trusted.
Best-selling doctors, Hemfelt, Minirth, and Meier, walk you through their ten proven stages to recovery from codependency that results from external circumstances.
Humans are susceptible to codependency because of our sinful tendency to use defense mechanisms to fool ourselves. In codependent relationships, deceitful games are played, and important Christian principles are often taken out of context and abused.
God wants us to have healthy relationships with a balance between being dependent and independent. The doctors describe how the most effective means of overcoming codependent relationships is to establish or deepen a relationship with Christ Himself.
They describe the causes of codependency, pointing out the factors that perpetuate it, and lead readers through their ten stages of recovery.
Continue a deeper study with the Love Is a Choice workbook, available separately.
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Read this prayerfully with a surrendered heart and mind. I say this because our defense mechanisms can have us locked up so tight that helpful thoughts cannot penetrate the armor we have going on. Work on wanting to know. Work on believing there is hope, and that you are worth so much more than what you’ve been told.
The weather fluctuations are crazy. Last week the highs were over 30 degrees celsius and now today the furnace is on. And I’m still cold.
I’m restless too. That’s the reason why I’m dong this now. Get a few things off my chest so maybe I can settle down and sleep tonight.
I’m still thinking about yesterday’s post where the discussion started with an app on my cell phone that was driving me crazy and then morphed into a discussion about trust issues and fear.
A few things bother me out of that story. One is, I know there are readers who understand and empathize with discussions about abuse, triggers, and PTSD and then there are others who don’t. It’s the readers who don’t that trouble me.
There are other readers who are glad to hear these stories, it validates things they have endured. There is comfort in knowing we are not alone in our struggles.
Another thing that bothers me; those who would say it’s all in the past why can’t you lay it aside, stop rehashing it and move on.
That’s the thing, I’m not reliving anything, ever. My subconscious mind won’t let me. My conscious mind knows enough (it steers away and refuses to think) that the two are in collusion and neither one will let me remember traumatic events. Small details, discussions, memories over the course of many years have allowed me to piece together a hazy but accurate picture of what went on. My mind just shuts down and closes up shop at the mention of this subject.
Reactions, mostly inappropriate (as in not fitting to the situation) such as the one I had regarding a new app on my phone, one that should have been no big deal. A well adjusted mind would thought – interesting, wonder what that’s about – and then explored to figure it out. I viewed it as an enemy trying to impose unwanted interference in my life.
It’s only been a few months since I’ve started to look closely at these reactions, to try and unpack what is going on in my head when it happens. I would name my emotional reaction as the panic you have when a hated spider comes near and you jump, scream, and run. I don’t actually do those things but the emotions running through me feel exactly like that. Get away, get away, get away!!!
To be afraid of something, there has to have been a traumatic encounter of some sort somewhere along the line. The trouble is I have no conscious memories to help me figure these things out. On the other hand, I’m sure it’s a bigger blessing that I can’t remember. There are a few disturbing words that I know apply to me. Good thing I can’t remember what happened.
There is one shadowy memory that has been with me forever it seems. It took many decades for me to figure out what it meant, not that I was trying, or wanting to know. In fact it was the opposite. My curiosity level was zero.
More recently I’ve figured out who was there for that event. There was one man who disapproved of the situation but stayed to protect me as best he could. I can’t explain the gratitude I feel now when I think of him and that memory.
Anyway, that’s enough for this time. My anxiety level has dropped and it’s time for sleep. Any more would probably be counter-productive anyway.
When I started this I wanted to express this story in a way that didn’t feel cryptic or disjointed. I’m not sure that I’ve succeeded.
It’s funny how a lighthearted conversation can turn into something so much more.
So the back story is that this annoying application showed up on my android phone a number of months ago and it kept wanting to open things up for me. I had no idea where it came from or why it was there. Unequivocally, I wanted it gone. Stop trying to take over my phone and my life.
Nothing worked the same with it there. I was happy with life before it showed up and I just wanted it off my phone so things could go back to normal. I even searched out removal instructions but couldn’t make them work for some reason.
After limping along for a very long time I mentioned it at my daughter’s house yesterday, complaining that I missed dates because I couldn’t access my calendar anymore. She enlisted the help of my grandson and while he searched to see what the app was all about before he looked for removal instructions, I laughingly but vehemently admitted to my rebelliousness at the app for trying to take over my life.
I’d figured out how to work around it for most things just not everything and I was highly resentful.
This was new territory for my daughter, I think she called it an eye opening experience listening to me rant about how much I hated the interference of this thing. Thankfully she didn’t enlarge on her comment during the family Zoom call later on.
So with my grandson’s search, he discovered the annoying app must have been an update and it was intended to launch apps, replacing the last version of an app launcher. It wasn’t the enemy I took it for and it wasn’t trying to take over my life and force me to do things I didn’t want to do.
There was a choice for just-once or always. I thought that meant it was an optional thing and the just-once was to decide if I wanted it or not. Turns out the just-once was to let me choose between two versions. He checked them out, we decided on always, problem solved.
At the time, I thought the whole conversation was hilarious. Later, thinking about why I felt like I was being pressured to do it’s biding, the conversation in my head took on a more serious tone.
Part of the problem in the misunderstanding is that while I can figure out how to use most apps, I have a problem with operating system issues. It’s always been that way. Probably because the need for action shows up so seldom.
The bigger part of the misunderstanding is more complicated. Thinking about my knee jerk reaction and my unreasonable position of viewing the app as the enemy, I have to admit, an irrational response on my part is pretty normal as a first reaction to many things.
I see the enemy everywhere because I have major trust issues.
I have to figure out how to make positive changes.
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I’ve been thinking about a dog. After seeing my grandson’s new puppy. A dog would be an easy way to share my life with another being and allow a little more than the usual contact with other humans.
Hmmmm.
I know. I have to stop thinking that everyone and everything is out to harm me. Fear is no way to live a fulfilling life.
BookBub has a suggestion for us with one of our favorite authors.
Never Forget the Past: A Clean Romantic Suspense (The Men of Fire Beach Book 3)
Amazon quote:
Could you let your family believe you were dead if you thought it was the only way to save them?
Five years ago, Billy “Bubba” Campbell had a different name, but after narrowly escaping an attempt on his life, he fakes his death and leaves town to keep his family safe. He’s adjusted to life in Fire Beach, but when Makenna re-enters his life, he is forced to make a gut-wrenching decision: Continue living his lie or return to his hometown to help her catch the killer.
Captain Makenna Drake believed she was saving Matt Fisher’s life when she convinced him to leave his life behind, but now the fires have started again. As the only victim to survive, she hopes seeing Matt will fluster the killer enough to make a mistake. But can she protect him this time or will the killer finish the job started five years ago?
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This next book was suggested yesterday and the suggester’s name escapes me. It’s definitely still a bargain.
Flying Fossils (Women of Fossil Ridge Book 1)
Amazon quote:
“Some women play bingo and go quietly into the night. My mother steals cars and breaks out of Alzheimer’s units.”
From USA TODAY bestselling Author Lynne Gentry comes this heartwarming peek inside a mother/daughter relationship turned upside down.
My aging mother is proof that not every southern woman is sweet tea and sympathy. Momma can’t remember which road to take when she has to drive from her ranch to the small town where she grew up. But she can recount every detail of the day I broke her heart. Her inability to forgive me has made her as crusty as the tiny fossils that cover the river’s limestone bluffs. After wasting twenty-five years trying to chip away this hurt, I finally decided it was just easier to stay away.
Then Momma fell and broke her hip. I flew home to try to mend fences with her one more time. Her refusal to let me take her back to Washington DC to convalesce left me no choice but to leave her in an assisted living center in Texas. I regret telling her that I thought her memory lapses meant it was time to sell the ranch. The moment she was strong enough to manipulate her walker, she stole a car and broke out of rehab. Just to prove me wrong. Again.
Now Momma is missing and I’m sandwiched between two impossible choices: stay in DC with my troubled teenager or go to Texas to find my demented mother. Either way, I feel like I’ve already lost.
The story of the Slocum women is the story many of us are facing. Navigating the care of an aging parent while parenting our own children is never easy. Some days you just have to laugh to keep from crying.
This series serves up a generous helping of laughs and hope. It’s a touching addition to your collection of southern small-town, generational authors like Ann B. Ross, Jan Karon, and Beth Hoffman.
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Currently I’m reading and enjoying an author new to me, it is still a bargain and so are books 1 & 3 in the series. This is definitely holding my interest.
Every Secret Thing (Acts of Valor, Book 2): Romantic Suspense
Amazon quote:
Former NFL Player Turned Navy SEAL Battles Life and Death for Love and Justice in the Christian Romantic Suspense, Every Secret Thing, by Rebecca Hartt
–Present Day, Virginia Beach, Virginia–
Navy SEAL Lt. Lucas Strong isn’t about to let his platoon leader, Lt. Mills, go to prison for a crime he didn’t commit. It’s their retiring commander who should face court-martial for amassing stolen weapons. With the evidence proving the commander’s guilt destroyed, and every witness dead, Lucas must find his only remaining hope, Charlotte Patterson, a gutsy NCIS intern with a photographic memory–missing but believed alive.
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Another interesting book showed up just when I thought I was done.
Copycat Killer (True Blue K-9 Unit: Brooklyn Book 1)
Amazon quote:
Murder strikes close to home for a new K-9 unit in Brooklyn
When a double homicide is strikingly familiar to a twenty-year-old cold case, Detective Nate Slater is rattled by the parallels. With a child as the only witness, he and his K-9 partner must protect little Lucy and her aunt, Willow Emery. Nate’s rough past means he always keeps an emotional distance…but in this case getting closer is the only way they’ll all survive.
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OK, I’m going to stop looking now.
If you have opinions on any of the authors shared here I would appreciate hearing about it. It would be help me make good choices, to know your likes and dislikes. I’m guessing on somethings and could be wrong. Please leave comments. Much appreciated.
Podcasts. They have captured my attention and it would be safe to say I have been binge-watching often lately. Tonight was no exception and this is where the one-thing-lead-to-another comes in. And, in the end it led to books. I think that is quite awesome.
It’s no secret that there is abuse in my background. I’ve talked about it sparingly along the way and by the looks of it, will be sharing again.
As is often the case, the interviewee on the podcast has recently come out with a new book. Out of the six excellent videos watched tonight, the one to capture my interest the most was a story similar to mine. The ending in relation to her marriage was better than mine, aside from that though, the content was definitely helpful. Spoiler alert… the issue in the marriage was pornography, highly addictive and destructive. At the end of this post I’ll share the link for the podcast. Here is the book…
Choosing a Way Out: When the Bottom Isn’t the Bottom
Amazon quote:
Was it all a lie?
When the author heard her husband’s confession, it took her breath away. Looking back she realized her husband’s sin exposed the deception in her own life. This uninvited crisis proved to be the impetus for her ultimate healing.
Kirsten writes that for most of her adult life she believed:
• She wasn’t good enough, or pretty enough, or smart enough, or rich enough, or talented enough, or whatever enough.
• She wasn’t a good person. She was too stubborn, opinionated, and direct.
• She was a failure because she’d tried something bold and audacious and didn’t succeed like planned.
• She was invisible and forgettable.
In these pages, you’ll experience raw honesty and a clear path through the pain. You’ll realize that no depression is too dark and no lie too strong. Discover a powerful process where you exchange isolation for accountability and deception for deliverance. Today you can experience a way out, even in the bleakest of circumstances where the bottom doesn’t feel like the bottom. The truth is that God is greater than your pain.
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There’s more.
In the suggestion strip at the bottom of the screen there was a book that appears to apply to me. The longer I looked at it, the more familiar it felt. I checked. I have two copies of it, gifted years ago by a concerned friend. I have read it and taken copious notes, it was that helpful. I have it but will tell you about it again anyway.
The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse
Amazon quote:
For those who have experienced childhood sexual abuse and those who love and care for them, The Wounded Heart offers a tender, compassionate window into the psychological effects of abuse and the theological foundations for healing.
Thirty years ago, with great courage and vision, Dan Allender brought Christians to the table to acknowledge, understand, and help victims heal from their experience of the evil of sexual abuse. His work continues to help victims and those who love them to honestly acknowledge their abuse, understand the unique challenge of repentance for victims of abuse, and learn to love boldly in defiance of their trauma. Ultimately Dan offers the bold assurance to sexual abuse victims that even they can find their way to joy and hope in the comforting embrace of a good God.
The Wounded Heart has sold over 400,000 copies and has been the first book family, friends, counselors, pastors, and victims have turned to in search of Christian answers to the calamity of sexual abuse. With a new introduction reflecting on the ongoing importance of the book, and a companion workbook for personal and group recovery, The Wounded Heart continues to offer an urgently needed word of grace in a world ravaged by sexual abuse.
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So, further investigation led me to a newer book that I think is an updated version of The Wounded Heart. I think I need to read this one too.
Healing the Wounded Heart: The Heartache of Sexual Abuse and the Hope of Transformation
Amazon quote:
First published in 1989, Dan Allender’s The Wounded Heart has helped hundreds of thousands of people come to terms with sexual abuse in their past. Now, more than twenty-five years later, Allender has written a brand-new book on the subject that takes into account recent discoveries about the lasting physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual ramifications of sexual abuse.
With great compassion Allender offers hope for victims of rape, date rape, incest, molestation, sexting, sexual bullying, unwanted advances, pornography, and more, exposing the raw wounds that are left behind and clearing the path toward wholeness and healing. Never minimizing victims’ pain or offering pat spiritual answers that don’t truly address the problem, he instead calls evil evil and lights the way to renewed joy.
Counselors, pastors, and friends of those who have suffered sexual harm will find in this book the deep spiritual guidance they need to effectively minister to the sexually broken around them. Victims themselves will find here a sympathetic friend to walk alongside them on the road to healing.
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One more for me from the suggestion strip.
For years I have been working on telling my story, looking for ways to express it more effectively. It’s important for several reasons. It’s therapeutic for me and affirming to those who hear it.
The percentages listed for those suffering as victims of abuse is high.
It looks like the numbers involved in addictions is even higher. Addicts leave victims, adding even more to the number of casualties. The importance of sharing our story is even greater now than it was when I started on this healing journey many years ago.
To Be Told: Know Your Story, Shape Your Future
Amazon quote:
God wants to reveal himself through your story. Discover how he has written your life so far, and how he is leading you into the rest of your story.
“This is a book worth reading. To make sense of your life. To discover the role God is giving you in his story.”—John Eldredge, bestselling author of Wild at Heart and Get Your Life Back
Everyone wants clearer guidance from God on what to do with their future. In this insightful book, therapist and professor Dan Allender shows you how to listen to the stories of your life and identify the themes that God has written there. As you begin to understand both the hope and the heartache, you will gain a clearer sense of the meaning that God has written into every detail of who you are. You’ll also see how he invites you to join him in coauthoring the rest of your story. God is your Author, and he is showing you how to follow him into the future.
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In the above blurb the book Wild at Heart is mentioned. Excellent book. I have read my copy and highly recommend it. It’s written for men but gives helpful insight to the women in their lives.
Wild at Heart Expanded Edition: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul
Amazon quote:
God did not create men to be nice boys. He created us to live a life of passion, freedom and adventure. To be dangerous men living in a really big story.
God designed men to be powerful. Simply look at the dreams and desires written in the heart of every boy: to be a hero, a warrior, to love a beauty, to live a life of adventure.
But sometime between boyhood and the struggles of yesterday, most men lose heart. All those passions, dreams, and desires get buried under deadlines, pressures, and disappointments. Christianity feels irrelevant to the recovery of their heart. No wonder most men leads lives of quiet resignation, meanwhile looking for a little “life” on the side. In this provocative book, Eldredge invites men to wholeheartedness by
recovering their true masculine hearts;
healing the wounds and trauma in their stories; and
delighting in the strength and wildness they were created to offer the world.
In this updated and expanded edition of the timeless, bestselling classic, John Eldredge calls men—and the women who love them—to discover the true secret of a man’s soul and embrace the danger, passion, and freedom God intended for every man.
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I didn’t plan for this post to go so long but it’s all good stuff.
As promised, here is the link for the podcast that started this ball rolling for me. The interview was in two parts and it was the second that impacted me the most. They were both good though.
It would probably be a good idea to watch part one first to give you context. Due to the length of this post I won’t include the link but it will show up for you when this one is opened.
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I hope this will be as helpful to you on your journey as it has been to me on mine.
This is one of those just say something kind of days. You know, those days when it’s time to write a post and you have nothing.
So, this title is the thought that’s been rolling around in my head all day. It’s entirely true, and to my mind, it’s hilarious. I love a good play on words.
Probably the reason why this idea is lodged securely in my mind, like a silly song that stays with you all day, is because I lived it over the weekend.
Saturday afternoon was the time for our regular monthly writer’s group. We take turns chairing the meeting and February was supposed to be my turn. It’s bad enough when we meet in person and I can look around the table to see everyone; make it a Zoom meeting and it is confusing and worse. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do a good job and decided to look for a fill-in. I felt the group deserved to have a better experience than I could give them.
Some time after arranging my replacement I read and enjoyed a book featured in a previous blog post here. This added a new element to the meeting as I shared my enjoyment with the rest of the executive. With the help of several of our group members who knew her personally, I was able to contact the author. She would love to read an excerpt for us from her short story. Once this was all settled the agenda came out for the meeting and I was surprised to find I was still on it. In a smaller capacity but still. No one said a word, they just snuck it in there.
It all worked out ok. I was ready with my part mapped out in my head and it went smoothly. Probably because concern for my newly assigned task overshadowed every other worry.
In the end, I had the ability. It wasn’t like I couldn’t do it before but now I could.
The best way to describe why I couldn’t do it would be disability. Something crippling my ability
At this point I can hear one of our best writers saying “when you make statements like that I want to hear details”
I can tell you that I have complex PTSD from ongoing childhood abuse. It started before I was born and ended when I was twelve. I can’t give you details because I don’t have memories. They talk about abuse victims compartmentalizing as a coping mechanism. That’s what my mind did. Ninety-eight percent of my childhood memories are locked in a sealed vault and even though I’ve given myself permission to bring some of them out, for the most part, it’s not happening. I was describing it to my daughter the other day, It’s like watching a room with small windows… every now and then a shadow goes past. That’s the extent of it.
I’ve been in heavy denial about all of this for most of my life. Up until about fifteen years ago when one of my brothers insisted that I own it and admit the truth. This admission was the beginning of a new dimension in my healing journey
One discovery along the way was this: My disability comes not from memories but from triggers rising out of memories buried deep inside me. The deep place that will never forget.
In the past I refused to even think about the shadowy memories I did have.
It turned out there was a better way. I could stop and examine the shadows. Ask questions. Try to understand family dynamics and recognize what was behind abusive actions. There were many well-that-explains-a-lot moments once I allowed myself to question, to take a honest look.
So, I guess the question is, how does this affect my ability to do or not to do? It’s this way… my survival response is to shut down.
Freeze. Panic attacks.
I’ve had many theories about why this is.
A break through moment tells me it’s all about feeling safe.
Why don’t I feel safe? Honestly, aside from rooted in old memories, I have no idea.
I think it will take more than my lifetime to heal from this.
Maybe that’s not such a bad thing. At least I’m making progress.
Maybe can’t could even turn into can someday.
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One thing I know for sure, I’m not alone on this journey. Many others walk a similar path.
Sharing our stories is an effective way to add support to our fellow travelers.
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I will admit this started with a light heart but didn’t end that way. That’s not a bad thing. Honesty is the good thing.
It keeps happening and I have no idea why. It happened again today.
Jerry Jenkins, author of dozens of books, loves to encourage writers to become the best they can be. He often puts out free mini courses and today I was gong to read the newest one. It’s called Breaking down the 7 main story elements. To write a story you have to be a writer.
That thought right there, being a writer, was the trigger to an intense, visceral, emotional, knee jerk, negative reaction. I know, it seems like that’s overkill on the descriptive words but that’s about how it is, Fight or flight. Just short of a melt down. This happens to me fairly often with this writer idea and I have no idea why. It makes no sense that I can see. I’m sure there must be a mental health professional out there somewhere, though, who could tell me why.
It’s funny because I have this denial thing going on and yet I’ve spent years working on my communication skills. More recently I’ve joined a writers group, started this blog, read whatever catches my eye teaching me how to be a better writer, and even started a little fiction story. Go figure.
So, after some settling down time, I read through the tutorial and took notes on Jerry’s material about 7 main story elements.
The presentation was encouraging to me in several ways.
First; I’m stalled out on the story I’m writing, have been for awhile now. As I read what Jerry had to say, some things began to come together in my mind. I know where I need to go next with my characters.
Second and more importantly; it helped in regard to Book Reviews. I love books, some more than others. I love in different ways, for different reasons. The challenge is to put words to emotional responses. The struggle to express myself has caused me to dislike and avoid book reviews.
I’m discovering that instructions on the how and why of writing is helping me understand both what makes a story relatable and what is happening in the writing of the story for it to draw me in so completely.
A discussion of the story elements and the words used to describe them has also helped tremendously. It’s getting easier to move past simply I love this book and on to compiling a list for the reasons why I love this book.
I’m still feeling inadequate to understand and express my thoughts about books, but it’s getting better. I’m excited about that. The attempt with this post is probably helping me more than you.
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The most enjoyable part in the learning to write process, for me anyway, is the reading of excellent books. They say to be a great writer we must read extensively. I am all over that.
My most recently read & enjoyed book is The Maid of Fairbourne Hall
Jerry Jenkins talked about the importance of describing the setting in layers throughout the story as opposed to a full description prior to stepping into the story itself.
Layers is the operative word here and this book did that.
The other thing this book did was make the story real, transporting me to a different time and place.
It’s a good thing this was Saturday and I could stick with it to the end.
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Currently, I’ve selected a series that’s been on my TBR list since the middle of July. After a few pages I’m hooked and since Terri Blackstock is a long time favorite I’m looking forward to this.
The If I Run Series: If I Run, If I’m Found, If I Live
If I Run … book 1
Casey knows the truth. But it won’t set her free.
Casey Cox’s DNA is all over the crime scene. There’s no use talking to police; they’ve failed her abysmally before. She has to flee before she’s arrested . . . or worse. The truth doesn’t matter anymore.
But what is the truth? That’s the question haunting Dylan Roberts, the war-weary veteran hired to find Casey. PTSD has marked him damaged goods, but bringing Casey back can redeem him. Though the crime scene seems to tell the whole story, details of the murder aren’t adding up.
Casey Cox doesn’t fit the profile of a killer. But are Dylan’s skewed perceptions keeping him from being objective? If she isn’t guilty, why did she run?
Unraveling her past and the evidence that condemns her will take more time than he has, but as Dylan’s damaged soul intersects with hers, he is faced with two choices: the girl who occupies his every thought is a psychopathic killer . . . or a selfless hero. And the truth could be the most deadly weapon yet.
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Writing this post has been helpful in working things out in my mind. I’m hoping it’s managed to make a little sense for you in reading it.
Check out JerryJenkins.com if you are interested in hearing more from him.
It’s been a warm and productive day, working on yard clean up. My neighbor took pity on me last week and spread weed killer on some of my overgrown flower beds. I’ve been trying to go green and deal with weeds by pulling them out by the roots. It was a losing battle, getting worse every time the weeds flowered, which was often. The killer did a great job and I’m loving the look of the big bed I managed to clear out today.
The previous owner was responsible for the beautiful landscaping and they were intolerant of any weed daring to grow in their yard. The first few years there were few weeds for me to deal with, I was reaping the benefit of their zealousness. I was away a number of summer weeks several years ago and that was the downfall. It’s been an uphill battle ever since.
This week has been very productive, if I can manage to fit in another one of two weeks of the same it could be celebration time. Fingers crossed. If I can get it all clean I’ll share some pictures.
No time has been spent looking for books today, at least not until now.
I see one that’s a possibility. It’s a start anyway. This is another author new to me and I don’t know what to expect but it looks interesting.
When the Heart Calls … a $0.99 bargain
Amazon quote:
Claire Sallaway has lived with an unpredictable heart condition for most of her life. With a plan in place to manage her symptoms, she has been able to avoid any major health problems and live a relatively normal life. With work, church and friends, her life is indeed full. Or so she thought. Settled in her job as a forensic scientist, Claire is content with her comfortable suburban life – until the day her heart betrays her and a man with the most intriguing ocean-blue eyes steps in, turning her world upside down.
Aaron Thurnham is the answer to Claire’s prayers. With the handsome, fun and God-fearing man by her side, life is blissfully perfect and full of adventure.
Until it isn’t.
When tragedy strikes and dreams are shattered, Claire clings desperately to the fragmented remains of her life. Heartbroken, and with every good thing stripped away, she is faced with a choice. Will she become paralyzed by fear? Or will she listen to the still small whisper of God and place her heart in His hands?
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Another bargain with the same author. Three books set in Australia for $1.34
The Hope Rising Series Box Set
Amazon quote:
River’s Edge How does a successful businessman end up with nothing but the clothes on his back and all his worldly possessions shoved into a bag? That’s the question Ben Tarbett asks himself time and again. When his world falls apart, Ben finds himself calling the banks of the Brisbane River home – a vastly different view to the one he had when working from a highrise in the heart of the city. Sheltering from the elements, and relying on food handouts, he longs for the day when he can once again have a roof over his head and be the father his daughter needs him to be.
All Natalie Allcroft wants to do is serve Jesus and bring hope to the less-fortunate and downtrodden who wander the streets of the city she now calls home. Volunteering with Hope Street Church, she is inexplicably drawn to the man who visits the breakfast van every morning. There’s something different about him. Something not quite as rugged and worn out as the other itinerants she meets. She’s seen the way he treats others, and is curious about his story.
Natalie’s desire has always been to serve. But when it comes to matters of the heart, there’s a big difference between guarding and giving. There’s a big difference between compassion and attraction. Is the line worth crossing?
Valley’s Reach It’s been two years since Brad Rowland witnessed an accident that changed his life forever. Two years of trying to escape the images that constantly haunt his dreams. Two years of finding comfort in the bottom of a bottle and pushing people away. His life is consumed with guilt and angst. No one understands his pain, and it’s better that way.
Receiving Treetops Bed & Breakfast as a gift from her aunt gave Eve McNeal the perfect excuse to escape the hectic pace of city life and the loneliness that has consumed her for so long. Amid the rainforest, she is free to tend to her guests and deal with the guilt of putting her mother with Alzheimer’s in a care facility. By offering hospitality to others, she is free to be herself and ignore the deep hurt she carries from a childhood injury that left her with visible scars.
But life’s not meant to be lived in solitude. When Brad finds himself on Eve’s doorstep, he is challenged to face up to his past. Eve is curious about the broken man she has taken in, and must face her own struggles if she is to show him the reason for her hope.
When broken souls collide, can wounds be healed and wholeness found?
Ocean’s Drift Shame and guilt follow Vanessa Silverton everywhere. A preacher’s kid, she rebelled from her parent’s faith years ago and has since lived with the consequences of making one wrong decision after the other. After one fateful night, she severs all contact with her friends and flees to the Sunshine Coast, longing to leave her past far behind. She escapes to a quaint coastal town finding work in a beachside cafe in an attempt to start afresh where no one knows her name or the past that haunts her dreams. But life doesn’t always go to plan, and soon her past catches up with her in a way she never anticipated.
The ocean is where Joel Ruthven finds solace from the grief that weighs heavy on his heart. Wrestling with God over the loss of his wife and daughter, he buries himself in his teaching job at the local high school and running the youth group at Seaside Fellowship. It’s better that way. Keeping busy means he doesn’t have time to entertain the melancholy that threatens to pull him under. He is inexplicably drawn to the new barista who serves up his daily coffee fix, yet is left questioning God about the fairness of life when her secrets come to light.
When a near tragedy brings past and present together, Vanessa and Joel must learn to surrender their fears and doubts to the One who holds them in the palm of His hand.
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I’m currently reading a book I’m having trouble getting in to. I may have to do some major skimming to see how it all ends. It’s still FREE. Check it out to see if you like it better than I do.
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I hope you have had a good weekend too, along with some Happy Reading.
Normally I hook these challenges together to create an ongoing chapter story. It pleases me to get as much mileage as possible out of my writing attempts. I did have a plan in mind to work this week’s prompt into today’s chapter (6) while advancing my story. At least I did until yesterday’s post with reference to Father’s Day. Plans have changed.
I consider myself thick skinned when it comes to my personal history. Much of the time I can talk about most of it matter-of-factly while minimizing the truth of our abusive family life. No big deal.
Yesterday I made reference to abusive relationships because, just like there are many who find Mother’s Day traumatic, there are many who find Father’s Day a traumatic experience. The reasons are different but still painful.
Now, working my way emotionally through the aftermath of yesterday, I realize trauma related to Father’s day goes deeper than first thought. Generally, the deeper the trauma the less likely we are to speak about it. Many are vocal every year about their negative experiences surrounding Mother’s Day. Today for the first time, I realize we are hearing a complete lack of corresponding comments surrounding Father’s Day. The silence speaks loudly, if we happen to be listening.
Yesterday I wanted to acknowledge mostly-forgotten hurting hearts. To be seen and understood means a lot to those living with unimaginable pain. It felt like the right thing to do, to offer support and encouragement.
It’s no surprise to find, once again, my conscious mind can’t handle the truth of my own life. It has deeply buried the negative and bought into the never-happened, no-big-deal lies. My brothers insist I need to face the uncomfortable truth. I find I don’t want to/can’t remember. Inappropriate (not fitting the situation) triggered responses are the only evidence of truth.
The triggered reaction arising out of yesterday’s sharing was a shock to my system. The emotional upheaval I woke up to this morning was a shock too. As a result this has been a recovery day. As the day wears on I’m starting to feel better.
My skin appears to be thinner than I believe it is.
I’m sharing all this now because I feel compelled. Partly because I know the power of story to comfort and help others. Partly because I know the value of expression to release pent up emotions. I’m trusting that life will be incrementally better after acknowledging another sliver of truth. So far it always has been and I have great expectations for now too.
May life be better for you too, as you acknowledge the truth (as you are able) of your situation.
Next week will be soon enough for anther installment in my continued story about Carly, an exposed woman in Witness Protection.
For the Love of Books 