love

Bargain Book June 22, 2022

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

An awesome book from an awesome author is on sale at a bargain price again. Charles Martin brings some of his books back every year or two for a few days. The first time I noticed this book was 2016 and every time after I remember how much I loved it.

Wrapped in Rain: A Novel

An internationally famous photographer, Tucker Mason has traveled the world, capturing things other people don’t see. But what Tucker can’t see is how to let go of his traumatic childhood and forgive his father.

On a sprawling Southern estate, Tucker and his younger brother, Mutt, were raised by their housekeeper, Miss Ella Rain, who loved the motherless boys like her own. Hiring her to take care of Waverly Hall and the boys was the only good thing their abusive and alcoholic father ever did.

When his brother escapes from a mental hospital and an old girlfriend appears with her son and a black eye, Tucker is forced to return home and face the agony of his tragic past.

Though Miss Ella has been gone for many years, Tucker can still hear her voice—and her prayers. “Life is a battle, but you can’t fight it with your fists. You got to fight it with your heart.” But finding peace and starting anew will take a measure of grace that Tucker scarcely believes in.

Wrapped in Rain follows Tucker’s journey from brokenness to healing through the everlasting power of love.

**********************

As a general rule, we have a tendency to underestimate the power of love.

As I read this synopsis, I can see I need to read this book again too.

The new cover is beautiful.

This and that June 20, 2022

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment
Photo by Lukas on Pexels.com

It’s hard to think when it’s hot. Which means it’s not easy stringing words together for a coherent blog post. Thank goodness for air conditioning or it would be even worse. This is going to have to be one of those just start talking posts.

I can’t imagine that I have anything to say that anyone wants to hear. I feel like writing but that thought alone is enough to keep me from it. I think I will press ahead anyway. I’m curious to see what will come out of my mouth if I do. I can always delete it if it’s too terrible.

There are a couple of things I’m feeling excited about. We are planning a family camping trip in July, that is exciting. It has been a very long time since the last one. It will be a family reunion of sorts. We are widely scattered these days, some of us more than others, and this time together has been a long time coming, especially due to the events of the last two years.

The campground reservations are made and paid for and serious planning is underway to make sure we have enough equipment and food to keep everyone happy. The best thing about camping is, it is “days off” for the whole time. No work (job), no phone, no internet. It’s like hiding out from the world playing all day every day without feeling guilty.

There will be water and fishing, maybe swimming, although I’m sure the water will still be pretty cold. Definitely a boat. Time to sit and visit, read, soak up a few rays of sunshine. Informal meals around the campfire. wiener roasts, marshmallow roast and s’mores. (a hot melted marshmallow squished with a piece of chocolate bar between two cookies. Hot coffee and pancakes on a cool morning and hot chocolate around the campfire in the cool of the evening. And games, lots of games.

Our family has a long history of camping. We started before the kids were born and that was our holiday of choice every year until summer jobs got in the way. This year will be special because we are beginning to lose the next generation to jobs and summer jobs.

Life flies by at an alarming rate. One more reason to savor every moment we have together as a family.

I said I was excited about a couple of things. I’ll save the next thing for another time. I want to camp on this nostalgic thought spot for awhile.

Photo by Jens Mahnke on Pexels.com

If you have never tried camping you should. Especially if you can handle a simpler life. There is nothing like it to recharge the batteries.

I will admit, it is not a five star experience. But for those who don’t care about those kinds of stars, it is wonderful.

It’s Mother’s Day May 08, 2022

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment
Photo by George Dolgikh @ Giftpundits.com on Pexels.com

I’m thinking gratefully about all the women in my life who have been mothers to me over the years. Some by blood, some by marriage, and some evolving out of friendships. All of them hold a special place in my heart and I’m grateful for having had them in my life.

I’m also thinking about the girls/women in my life who are mothers to my grandchildren. I couldn’t be prouder of all three of them, they have done such an awesome job of being moms. We all know, one way or another, that raising kids is a daunting task at times. Kudos to them for allowing their kids to survive. lol I raised a strong willed child and he survived, now it’s his turn. Pay back is so much fun.

God created mothers with a strong love and protective instinct for their children. Think mama bear. Thank goodness he did.

Thank you to women everywhere who have loved their children well.

If your children are young and you are exhausted you are probably having serious doubts about the well part right about now. One day before you know it they will be grown and you will see things in a different light.

Some of you may be brokenhearted over your adult children. We can do everything right and things still turn out wrong. Our grown children can make terrible choices even when we have loved them well.

Think of the moms you love and along with me, take a moment to be grateful for each and every one them.

Mark, Buddy, and the Book of Common Prayer January 10, 2022

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

Two of my favorite singers are having a deep conversation about today`s scripture reading in the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer. At least it starts out that way and then it evolves into so much more.

While I was listening to them live I added a couple of videos here to introduce you to Buddy and his amazing talent. Who knew he would sing the same song live. Now you get to see him perform in two different settings.

Introduction to Buddy

One of his songs

I love today`s podcast, I hope it blesses you as much as it does me.

They will be doing this again and I plan to share them all.

Read and enjoyed December 01, 2021

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

I’m excited to share this enjoyed read with you.

In my world, 5 stars are reserved for truly great books.

In this case the definition of a great book is highly subjective. We are not talking literary excellence here with a book appealing to the masses. Although we do hope many will read and enjoy it.

The writing is taken into account and it is at a high level, editorially speaking, which adds to the enjoyment.

The most important thing, though, is this book has chemistry. That is what makes it awesome.

Like in a movie where they have the right story and the right pairing of actors with skill, but also with that special something that just makes it work.

I read a lot of Chautona Havig, and I have to say her book one in this collection is my number one favorite of all time. It has a solid five stars from me.

I’ve moved on to book two but couldn’t wait to share book one with you.

Home for Christmas: The Christmas Lights Collection

♥ The Stars of New Cheltenham by Chautona Havig

Christmas in Rockland—battleground or romantic?

Avalon is ticked—seriously livid.  Who does this Marine recruiter think he is? Her brother is a boy and is not ready to be sacrificed on the altar of “service to your country.”  No. Thank you. When trying to talk sense into Max doesn’t work, she does the only think she can think of. Take it to the top.

Gareth Hudson has an exemplary record as a Marine recruiter and knows a good man when he sees one.  So when Maxton McCollum starts asking questions in a diner one afternoon, it was obvious. This was a match made in military heaven.  One young man anxious to serve his country.  One country ready to train him to be the best version of himself.

So when Avalon walks into Gareth’s recruiting office, all the wrong kinds of fireworks explode. In a peacekeeping move unlike him, Gareth asks for four Saturdays to change her mind. If he can’t, he’ll suggest that Max wait six months before signing up.

Romance wasn’t part of the bargain, and with their age difference, Gareth knows it still shouldn’t be, but how do you resist the pull of love at Christmas?

******************************

I hope you love this as much as I did.

The rest of the collection has authors worth reading too. Just sayin’

Final notes on Love Like You`ve Never Been Hurt November 28, 2021

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

Chapter Six is about Loving-Kindness.

To catch the full impact of the chapter you need to read the book. My notes are never comprehensive, they are short quotes that capture the essence of a thought standing out to me. Something that grabs my heart.

Page 102

If you want to love like you`ve never been hurt, get rid of bitterness and start being kind.

Being kind means treating people with respect, apologizing sincerely, and stop criticizing. Doing this all the time.

Page 162

Forgiveness is important in loving but the other side of it is “I`m sorry.“

If you want to reconcile a relationship, you must be willing to say “I`m sorry.“

*****************************

This book has many good things to say to us, they are just not always on topic. That`s why skimming to the end for the sake of the topic seems like a good idea for now.

I`ll share a few of the relevant thoughts outlined on Page 226

Key Principles Designed to Help You Love.

  • Love never fails. Choose love over hurt.
  • It`s never wrong to love people who have messed up.
  • It`s unforgivable to not forgive.
  • We can begin to love others when we love ourselves.
  • We are called to be kind.
  • Instead of fanning the flames of discord become a peacemaker.

And a little more.

Page 228

Offenses are inevitable. No one is exempt.

Some of us look at opposition as a bad thing.

Opposition can cause you to face things and do things you could not have done, had you not had the opposition.

Bottom line.

Never give up.

*****************************

That is the end of this book.

As mentioned earlier, many helpful things were shared in this book and it has been a good read even though it strayed off topic a fair bit. It was written by a pastor with real life experiences not a psychologist so that explains why the perspective is different.

I enjoyed this exercise of sharing a non-fiction book with you.

There are still a number of unread books similar to this on my shelf and I`m planning to choose another one to continue on with this experiment.

It gives me the extra incentive needed to get with it and read instead of allowing them to sit and pile up.

My hope is that you will also find these books helpful as you travel on your personal healing journey.

P.S. as I read back over this post I`m reminded of a book I read years ago.

The flavor of this post is all about changes within us. This thought is reminding me of a book called Lord Change Me.

Really, in the end the only person we can change is ourselves. I know it sounds unfair but it is reality. Changes have to come from inside us, external pressures accomplish little most of the time. We cannot force someone else to want to change

Changing ourselves, especially in the areas of forgiving and loving, has a positive effect on the atmosphere of a relationship. Change begets change.

It pays to embrace change for ourselves.

Notes on Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt Nov 21, 2021

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

Last time we ended just before the topic… Changing the channel on our invasive words and thoughts.

Page 92:

There are a number of components and I will highlight a few that stand out to me. There is so much more to be said, reading the book would be helpful.

...how you can start: Change what you tell yourself. … Talk back to your inner critic.

The most important battles we fight, many times, happen internally.

The past can be healed in only one way: Forgive it. That is the one thing you can do for yourself that can change all of your tomorrows.

**********************

Page 93 – 96

I’m going to deviate from the book here. The author is dealing with shame in this section and uses the example of the Prodigal Son in the Bible. He tells how the father, with love, received his son back home. Despite his “bad boy” lifestyle, wasting his inheritance, and returning home in disgrace.

The father is a picture of the way God loves us and receives us no matter what we’ve done or what has been done to us.

I’m deviating from the book, though, because I think it’s important for us to understand the difference between shame and guilt. The information I’m about to share I’ve seen expressed in many places over the years, but for today’s purpose I found it laid out on verywellmind.com under living with BPD.

I’m paraphrasing here for space sake.

Guilt is the feeling you have related to things you have done. With guilt you can take steps to make things right and move on.

Shame is the feeling you have related to you are, or who you’ve been led to believe you are, your whole self not just an event. Shame it is not as easily dealt with because there is nothing you can do to make restitution. It’s about who you are, not something you’ve done.

There is an excellent ten minute podcast on their website discussing the shame we have been hiding and the link is posted below.

https://www.verywellmind.com/the-verywell-mind-podcast-5113058

The important take away from the podcast was this: there are two things shame cannot survive. One is exposure, tell someone. The second is empathy, tell someone who understands and is supportive.

It’s very important to find the right person to confide your secrets.

If shame is an issue for you, and it is for those of us who have survived an abusive life, this is highly helpful information.

So, back to the book. Check it out for the larger conversation.

I’m not sure what’s next but we will find out.

Notes on Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt Nov 18, 2021

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

This experience, reading through this book, has been beneficial.

Right off the hop, we have the first quote and there’s no disputing the truth of it.

Page 71: Forgiveness holds the key to freedom, to healing, to wholeness.

*************

Page 75: – Forgiveness does not mean you forget what happened.

Page 76: – Forgiveness does not release the offender from consequences.

Page 77: – Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation.

**************

Page 79: Forgiveness is a decision. Choose to forgive.

Practical steps to allow forgiveness to happen.

Open your heart. Extend compassion. But most importantly…

Release the person from the prison you put them in inside your heart.

***********

The final quote is a useful admonition. Bottom of Page 79

Do not run away from forgiveness. Run to forgiveness. It is a great friend. If you choose to forgive, your heart will heal.

************

I’ve noticed several common qualities in those of us struggling to forgive.

We build protective walls. Massive protective walls.

We are imprisoned with our words. (I will never, I can’t…)

We imprison our offenders in our hearts. As long as they dwell locked up inside of us we can never forgive.

Letting them out of our prison doesn’t do anything to free them but it surely does something to free us.

*************

Enjoy the book.

Grasp and enjoy freedom.

Notes from Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt Nov 16

/ For the Love of Books / Leave a comment

There is so much in this book. I’d have to quote the whole thing to share every shred of life giving wisdom. Since that is not possible, I’ll share a few nuggets. You will have to get the book to fill in the blanks.

***************

Page 16: When we seek to love God, love ourselves and love others, we can learn to love despite what happened in the past. We can mend brokenness that has plagued our families for generations.

Page 17: Many of us fail to realize that what matters most in life is relationships. (not power, fame, riches, social standing, things)

Page 26: To move forward you have to let go of the past. … If you will reach for a new day, God will begin, little by little, to release you from the past. … This means loving so intensely that it overrides all your natural instincts for bitterness and revenge.

***************

Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt: Hope, Healing and the Power of an Open Heart

I feel like the little bit I’ve shared from this book doesn’t begin to fill the need for explanation.

Love heals is something I’m hearing from many directions these days and I’ve found it to be true.

Love and hate can’t exist in the same body, at least not very well, it’s just not possible. As we work on growing the love portion in us the hate part will diminish and disappear. The best part of it is: the peacefulness of love makes life worth living.

****************

The discussion in this book is relevant to some of the conversations I’ve been in lately and that is very encouraging.

Enough so that I will be back looking for a few more nuggets to share next time.

Seriously, get the book if your life needs to hear these words, you won’t be sorry.

Wishing you the very best on your journey to wellness.