It is. Well, not quite yet at my house but, by the looks of this, it is at somebody’s house.
A beloved family member was out for a walk in the sunshine this morning, enjoying the scenery in her neighborhood, and shared some of her favorite spots with us. I think she may have even been bragging just a bit.
I have her permission to share with you. It is incredibly beautiful this time of year in her city, Victoria, British Columbia, Canada and these pictures are but a little taste of what it really looks like. I have to issue this disclaimer because some of the die-hard spring lovers over there would be wild to think that we aren’t showing the absolute best of what spring is really like in that part of the world.
For those of us living where winter comes for sure every year, we would be thrilled to pieces to have our world looking like this in the spring. I wouldn’t mind walking around the block, one bit.
Beloved family member will be 90 something this year… 4, maybe. I think she is amazing to be out walking around the neighborhood, snapping pictures on her iphone, sending them to those of us not lucky enough to live where she does lol.
One of those balconies up there is hers. On a sunny day she can sit out on the deck with a nice cup of tea, enjoying the mountains behind us, (work with me here, pretend we are right there looking up at her building) and yes, we do get to see those pictures too. Awesome.
Posting these pictures reminds me of some others I’d love to share if I could find them quickly. Since I can’t … next time.
Books are on my mind even though, currently, I have no book suggestions to offer you. Instead I’ve been rethinking some things. What’s working and what’s not. Some parts of the original blog routine seem to have fallen by the wayside and when I take a closer look I’m left thinking who cares? Maybe they filled a purpose once upon a time but things have changed. I’m going to restructure somethings in an effort to find new routines that make more sense.
So, that’s one thing I’ve been pondering, the other thing arises out of an email I received a few weeks ago. It was such a great experience that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. The email was chatty and charming. I’ve read other stories written by my friend and they didn’t have the same effect, I’ve been trying to figure out why and how to express it so it made sense. I could be wrong but I think it had to do with tone of voice. My friend is passionate and excitable. All of that emotion came through in her email, her other writing has been subdued by comparison. I would love to see her catch the vision for the difference. Her writing could catch fire.
Sometimes I think our writing can have a buttoned up feel to it. This is probably because we are trying too hard to have everything technically correct. I think readers like to hear us shout, stomp, and fling our arms about a little. Figuratively speaking of course.
I am forced to admit, I can’t be pointing any fingers at anyone as I have the buttoned-up mode perfected. Especially with in-person scenarios. It’s a bit easier to relax hiding behind a written blog. I’ve been putting lots of effort in, hoping repetition of healthy relaxed thoughts will create a new narrative in my head. It’s easy to know how it should be, not so easy to do.
Currently I’m reading a fun book. I enjoy cheeky and witty. The main character really doesn’t care what he thinks and isn’t afraid to stand up to him. In Regency times this just isn’t done and it is not sitting well with him. The problem is, his sister wants this particular match-maker to help with her shyness around men in order to find a husband. He would do anything for his sister, even apologize to a woman he can’t stand.
Saving Lord Berkshire: A Regency Romance (Regency Matchmakers Book 1)
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I was slow in posting this and now it is a new day. Maybe there will even be new book suggestions today. You will be hearing from me again soon if there are.
A commenter, Sheri Dye from ReadBetwixtWords , after my last post with read and enjoyed asks “You read all of these? In April?.. I’m so jealous! 😂”
The answer popping into my head would be much too long for the comment box so I promised a post.
Normally I would read while eating my breakfast but this subject was much too engaging. Every second was spent thinking of all the things I wanted to say in reply.
So, how do I do it? Well, it’s complicated but not a bad thing. I have to say that because my first response to the question puts a big smile on my face, I think it’s pretty funny and I LOVE reading. When I think about it from the listener’s perspective, though, it sounds pathetic.
I am, for the most part, happy with my life. Even if I could do things differently I probably wouldn’t.
There are two major contributing factors to my lifestyle. I’m an introvert and I’m a survivor with hermit tendencies. Translated that means I have major trust issues. Home is safe so I stay home. A lot. I venture out several times a month, maybe. It’s covid, where would I go anyway? lol To be honest, life looks about the same for me now as it did pre-covid. Really, there’s nothing new to see here.
So, we’ve established, I have no life and it’s just me. My life can be ordered however I like and if I choose reading over housework no one complains.
On the realistic side though, I do still have a job and I’m grateful. It adds purpose to my life and gives me contact with the outside world, limited though it may be. I work remotely and spend all of my working time online.
Aside from my job and must-do things to keep myself alive and comfortable, I can do pretty much whatever I want.
So, how do I read so many books?
First of all, no TV. I didn’t watch it anyway and let the subscription go.
I read every second I’m not compelled to be doing something else. I’m addicted, what can I say.
On average I read a book a day. Some don’t really take all that long. For others I’ve developed some habits and learned some tricks.
I try to keep moving. It’s easy to drop back to a stroll when it should be a quick-step. If a book turns out to be the one where every word needs to be read, I give it the respect it deserves and slow down to savor the experience. Not many books are like that though.
Then there are the choices of speed reading or skimming.
Speed reading, I try but don’t use it much as it’s not often that I need to remember everything I’ve just read.
Skimming, I let my eyes quickly run down the middle of the page and at the bottom ask myself “Did I miss anything important?” If no then I keep going like that until a page shows up that deserves a closer look. Practice makes this an effective tool.
There are some things I flat out do not read.
Detailed descriptions of all kinds. What people are wearing. Surroundings. Some scenes between characters. Now and then a description sets the stage for future actions but mostly they do not. It takes more effort than I care to give for me to visualize whatever it is.
I avoid thought patterns and conversations. Sometimes the story is fixated on internal struggles and the same narrative happens over and over. Not worth my time to read it over and over.
Hop, skipping, jumping.
If the story moves slowly, I’ll skip paragraphs, pages and finally chapters. I’ll hop ahead a chapter, or two or three, at a time, stopping long enough to see what’s happening. Not much? Move on. Something? Stay awhile. If things are really bad I’ll jump to the last chapter or two where there is generally a story summary.
I love to read slowly and savor a book, if it deserves that kind of treatment. Honestly, most often they do not. There’s nothing wrong with giving it time if that’s what you want and at the same time, there’s nothing wrong with hurrying on through.
To read a book a day, I have to remind myself I don’t have time to sit and chat, I have to keep moving.
In a way this has become like a job to me. If I want to have something to say on this blog everyday I have to put in the time. If I download books and want to know about authors I’ve not read I have to find ways to keep up.
To summarize, if you want to read like I do: have no life and do not read every word.
It’s not perfect by any means but I love my life.
So, that’s how I do it!
And that picture? Totally me, sitting at my table for hours on end 🙂
There can never be too much helpful information. Although it’s good to be thoughtful in deciding which topic, and when.
I like to chose authors carefully, not everyone sells us good information. Misguided ideas or misinformed authors can do more harm than good.
I find it’s also helpful if I pay attention to my needs when it comes to the topic of the book. I’m not always emotionally ready for some topics and it ends up being harmful. Timing is everything sometimes.
Reading slowly enough to allow meditation time has been helpful too. It’s a great way to increase the impact of the information on my life. The trouble with this though, I can’t plough my way through these books the way I normally like to. What’s the point of reading it if I can’t absorb enough to make a difference, so I slow down and enjoy the journey.
Anyway, tonight’s book was suggested by a friend who is aware of my current place on the road to wellness. She’s heard Grant Mullen speak and respects his authority to handle the subject. She thinks this is a book I will find helpful so I’m going to give it a shot. I don’t think I currently have any of his books in my library, this will be a new voice for me.
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Emotionally Free: A Prescription for Healing Body, Soul, and Spirit
Amazon quote:
Are you struggling to control your thoughts, moods, and emotions? Are you tired of always living with a sense of spiritual defeat?
God wants us to be more than saved. He wants us to be transformed by the renewing of our mind.
Emotionally Free will show you how you can be transformed in body, soul, and spirit. You will discover a freedom you never knew was possible and reach a better understanding of how to resolve depression, anxiety, and mood swings. As a Christian mental health physician, Dr. Grant Mullen has observed the constant struggle that so many Christians live with every day. Many churches rarely acknowledge this struggle. Through patient interviews and his own journey, Dr. Mullen found three links in the chain of emotional bondage that keep Christians bound spiritually, mentally and emotionally. Emotionally Free describes those three links and how with God’s help we can be set free to live a transformed and victorious life.
Learn how to assess your thoughts, personality, and spirit. Emotionally Free puts an end to the unnecessary competition that has existed among psychiatry, counselors, and deliverance ministers. These are important complimentary ministries that we all need. This book explains the role of each and how to know when you need them. You will also learn how depression, anxiety, and mood swings affect Christians in a unique way, and you will be able to assess your own moods and determine if you need medical treatment. Reach a greater understanding of where your spiritual authority comes from and how to use it to set yourself and others free. No matter how suffocating your bondage is now, God is waiting and willing to set you free. Dr. Mullen clearly outlines steps to invite the Holy Spirit into the problem to heal and restore you. Discover a new freedom in your mind, attitudes, reactions, and relationships as you become Emotionally Free.
Dr. Grant Mullen is a mental health physician in Ontario, Canada. He writes and lectures internationally on how medical treatment, deliverance and the healing of our emotional wounds all work together to break the chains of emotional bondage. Dr. Mullen has a special interest in how depression, anxiety and mood disorders affect Christians. Grant is married to Kathy and they have two children.
Podcasts. They have captured my attention and it would be safe to say I have been binge-watching often lately. Tonight was no exception and this is where the one-thing-lead-to-another comes in. And, in the end it led to books. I think that is quite awesome.
It’s no secret that there is abuse in my background. I’ve talked about it sparingly along the way and by the looks of it, will be sharing again.
As is often the case, the interviewee on the podcast has recently come out with a new book. Out of the six excellent videos watched tonight, the one to capture my interest the most was a story similar to mine. The ending in relation to her marriage was better than mine, aside from that though, the content was definitely helpful. Spoiler alert… the issue in the marriage was pornography, highly addictive and destructive. At the end of this post I’ll share the link for the podcast. Here is the book…
Choosing a Way Out: When the Bottom Isn’t the Bottom
Amazon quote:
Was it all a lie?
When the author heard her husband’s confession, it took her breath away. Looking back she realized her husband’s sin exposed the deception in her own life. This uninvited crisis proved to be the impetus for her ultimate healing.
Kirsten writes that for most of her adult life she believed:
• She wasn’t good enough, or pretty enough, or smart enough, or rich enough, or talented enough, or whatever enough.
• She wasn’t a good person. She was too stubborn, opinionated, and direct.
• She was a failure because she’d tried something bold and audacious and didn’t succeed like planned.
• She was invisible and forgettable.
In these pages, you’ll experience raw honesty and a clear path through the pain. You’ll realize that no depression is too dark and no lie too strong. Discover a powerful process where you exchange isolation for accountability and deception for deliverance. Today you can experience a way out, even in the bleakest of circumstances where the bottom doesn’t feel like the bottom. The truth is that God is greater than your pain.
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There’s more.
In the suggestion strip at the bottom of the screen there was a book that appears to apply to me. The longer I looked at it, the more familiar it felt. I checked. I have two copies of it, gifted years ago by a concerned friend. I have read it and taken copious notes, it was that helpful. I have it but will tell you about it again anyway.
The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse
Amazon quote:
For those who have experienced childhood sexual abuse and those who love and care for them, The Wounded Heart offers a tender, compassionate window into the psychological effects of abuse and the theological foundations for healing.
Thirty years ago, with great courage and vision, Dan Allender brought Christians to the table to acknowledge, understand, and help victims heal from their experience of the evil of sexual abuse. His work continues to help victims and those who love them to honestly acknowledge their abuse, understand the unique challenge of repentance for victims of abuse, and learn to love boldly in defiance of their trauma. Ultimately Dan offers the bold assurance to sexual abuse victims that even they can find their way to joy and hope in the comforting embrace of a good God.
The Wounded Heart has sold over 400,000 copies and has been the first book family, friends, counselors, pastors, and victims have turned to in search of Christian answers to the calamity of sexual abuse. With a new introduction reflecting on the ongoing importance of the book, and a companion workbook for personal and group recovery, The Wounded Heart continues to offer an urgently needed word of grace in a world ravaged by sexual abuse.
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So, further investigation led me to a newer book that I think is an updated version of The Wounded Heart. I think I need to read this one too.
Healing the Wounded Heart: The Heartache of Sexual Abuse and the Hope of Transformation
Amazon quote:
First published in 1989, Dan Allender’s The Wounded Heart has helped hundreds of thousands of people come to terms with sexual abuse in their past. Now, more than twenty-five years later, Allender has written a brand-new book on the subject that takes into account recent discoveries about the lasting physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual ramifications of sexual abuse.
With great compassion Allender offers hope for victims of rape, date rape, incest, molestation, sexting, sexual bullying, unwanted advances, pornography, and more, exposing the raw wounds that are left behind and clearing the path toward wholeness and healing. Never minimizing victims’ pain or offering pat spiritual answers that don’t truly address the problem, he instead calls evil evil and lights the way to renewed joy.
Counselors, pastors, and friends of those who have suffered sexual harm will find in this book the deep spiritual guidance they need to effectively minister to the sexually broken around them. Victims themselves will find here a sympathetic friend to walk alongside them on the road to healing.
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One more for me from the suggestion strip.
For years I have been working on telling my story, looking for ways to express it more effectively. It’s important for several reasons. It’s therapeutic for me and affirming to those who hear it.
The percentages listed for those suffering as victims of abuse is high.
It looks like the numbers involved in addictions is even higher. Addicts leave victims, adding even more to the number of casualties. The importance of sharing our story is even greater now than it was when I started on this healing journey many years ago.
To Be Told: Know Your Story, Shape Your Future
Amazon quote:
God wants to reveal himself through your story. Discover how he has written your life so far, and how he is leading you into the rest of your story.
“This is a book worth reading. To make sense of your life. To discover the role God is giving you in his story.”—John Eldredge, bestselling author of Wild at Heart and Get Your Life Back
Everyone wants clearer guidance from God on what to do with their future. In this insightful book, therapist and professor Dan Allender shows you how to listen to the stories of your life and identify the themes that God has written there. As you begin to understand both the hope and the heartache, you will gain a clearer sense of the meaning that God has written into every detail of who you are. You’ll also see how he invites you to join him in coauthoring the rest of your story. God is your Author, and he is showing you how to follow him into the future.
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In the above blurb the book Wild at Heart is mentioned. Excellent book. I have read my copy and highly recommend it. It’s written for men but gives helpful insight to the women in their lives.
Wild at Heart Expanded Edition: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul
Amazon quote:
God did not create men to be nice boys. He created us to live a life of passion, freedom and adventure. To be dangerous men living in a really big story.
God designed men to be powerful. Simply look at the dreams and desires written in the heart of every boy: to be a hero, a warrior, to love a beauty, to live a life of adventure.
But sometime between boyhood and the struggles of yesterday, most men lose heart. All those passions, dreams, and desires get buried under deadlines, pressures, and disappointments. Christianity feels irrelevant to the recovery of their heart. No wonder most men leads lives of quiet resignation, meanwhile looking for a little “life” on the side. In this provocative book, Eldredge invites men to wholeheartedness by
recovering their true masculine hearts;
healing the wounds and trauma in their stories; and
delighting in the strength and wildness they were created to offer the world.
In this updated and expanded edition of the timeless, bestselling classic, John Eldredge calls men—and the women who love them—to discover the true secret of a man’s soul and embrace the danger, passion, and freedom God intended for every man.
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I didn’t plan for this post to go so long but it’s all good stuff.
As promised, here is the link for the podcast that started this ball rolling for me. The interview was in two parts and it was the second that impacted me the most. They were both good though.
It would probably be a good idea to watch part one first to give you context. Due to the length of this post I won’t include the link but it will show up for you when this one is opened.
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I hope this will be as helpful to you on your journey as it has been to me on mine.
To be honest, I’m a little worried Aaron might stick it to me if I don’t get this done. I mean, I don’t think he’s vindictive or anything but you never know about some people, ya know?
The other thing I was a little worried about last night was opinion on how this piece should be done. In the end I decided Aaron may have strong opinions about some things, and I’m ok with that, but I’m going to stick to my guns and do this my way.
I wasn’t sure for a while if I’d have the stick-to-itiveness to stick with the program. It was pretty tempting to throw in the towel and say sorry Aaron, I just can’t do this. I mean I’ve been thinking about this since yesterday. What in the world is there to say about stick.
Things look a little better by the light of day, maybe I can stick it out and come up with something. I’ll be sure to let you know how that goes.
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They say you can tell things are done when they stick to the wall. I’m not sure but I think this could be done. Although, there is an inescapable niggling in the back of my mind. I’ve pretty sure I’ve missed some things.
This is a stick up.
Stick to the top of the blog (choice in settings lol)
Stick to your lane
Stick to my fingers
Sticky fingers (in more ways than one)
Help me out guys, what other good things have I missed?
Story prompt is hosted by Sunday Scribblings with Aaron over at peckapalooza The Confusing Middle
This is one of those days, mind going a million miles an hour, with nothing coherent to say.
My thoughts are in problem solving mode. Scattered and busy, busy, busy. Reading is definitely out of the question when it gets like this.
Since I couldn’t settle down enough to read, it seemed like the next best thing was podcasts. Several of my favorites posted today. New material.
One of them is in news format. A niche market, very focused. Often times it is light and fun and the co-hosts keep it interesting. Most of the news revolves around a world that I am not part of, but I enjoy hearing about it anyway. Except today. It definitely was not light and fun. That’s part of life though. It’s tragic but it’s real.
The first podcast I watched was my favorite. I thought about sharing it with all of you but I’m not ready to cast it out into the world just yet. I need to park on it for a bit. There was just so much to take in and I need time to digest even a fraction of it.
There were so many things I liked about it. The interviewer and interviewee were both interesting, engaged in the subject, with lots to say. In a way, the subject matter wasn’t new but their perspective was fresh and new. The purpose of the podcast was to encourage the listener to think. Most guests on the podcast have a new book out and I’d have to go back and check but if I remember right the title of the book tonight was Think Again.
By that he meant be willing to take out your thoughts, beliefs, opinions, even decisions, and with an open mind take an honest look to see if you still think/believe the same way.
I can remember having a thought similar to this back in my twenties, you know, that time in your life when you think you know a lot of things for sure. By experience I learned to avoid being loudly dogmatic about anything. Backtracking on a strongly held opinion was not an experience I particularly enjoyed.
Anyway, I am still living tonight’s inspiring experience. When it wears off I will listen to it again once or twice and then maybe I’ll share.
Instead, I will share what I was doing part of the time while listening/watching the podcasts.
When it’s finished I always need to savor it for a while. That’s why there is a finished one hiding under my diamond painting projects. One of these days it will go back in the box.
Well, I’m glad I stopped by to visit with you all. This exercise has been a settling experience. Much needed if I hope to sleep tonight.
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Tomorrow, (well technically today since it 1:13 AM) maybe we will get back to books.
Currently I’m reading and enjoying ….
Leaving November (Clayburn Novels Book 2)
Eight years ago, Vienne Kenney moved away from Clayburn and all its gossip to pursue a law degree in California. But now she has failed the bar exam again. Is she destined to be stuck forever, a failure—just like her father—in this tiny Kansas town?
Nine months ago, Jackson Linder left Clayburn with no explanation to anybody. Now he, too, is back. He isn’t sure he’s ready to face the rumors and well-meaning questions of the town’s busybodies. Yet he’s determined, once more, to make his art gallery a success—despite the secret that haunts him every day..
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Happy Reading!
(Yes, it’s still Christmas at my house. The tree is even still up in the other room. I’m thinking if I leave it another month or two I may as well go ahead and leave it up for next Christmas lol)
If you love Bluegrass music, join me. I’m rewatching a live performance from their bus. The Isaacs, a highly popular and greatly talented family of singer/song writers, were on the road last November and found themselves with a free night due to a covid cancellation. The whole band was there and ready to sing so why not go for it. It’s a little tight in such a small space but they did a great job with their impromptu musical sharing. It was relaxed and fun.
Live on the Isaacs Tour Bus!!! November 21, 2020
If you aren’t sure about Bluegrass this is a great chance to hear it for the first time.
I know I am in good company. That’s why we often see signs claiming it’s a fragrance free zone. Allergies abound. It’s too bad really, because some scents are exquisite. Wouldn’t it be great if it was possible to have pretty scents that are hypo-allergenic.
I used to wear perfume, way back in my teenage years, but had to quit. Something changed in me, my chemistry, to the point that what used to smell nice on me, suddenly didn’t. Sad, sad, day.
My allergic reactions have increased over the years and more and more things have became bothersome. Now, I avoid anything with a scent. There are a variety of reactions and some fragrances are less intolerable than others. I’m sure I could find something that would work for me but I don’t love perfume enough to search for just the right one.
This affliction affects many areas of my life, I’ve even had to quit a job over this issue.
Having left a job I loved (mostly, anyway) and taken another job that I didn’t, it was a safe place, I found myself in a bit of a dilemma.
The thing about this new place of employment was – it was full of scents of all kinds. Drugstores are like that. It had a thriving gift section with candles, oils, and all things pretty. The store also had a perfume case. While the gift section was near the front of the store the perfumes were at the back. It wasn’t difficult to avoid that area. Most of my time was on the cash registers at the front, well away from most things smelly.
My allergies were taking a back seat to more important life concerns, and I just put up with the minor reactions.
The interesting thing about perfumes was their attraction for shop lifters, a surprise to me.
There were other things in the store attractive to shop lifters too. Some products were a cheap substitute for alcohol. Others were ingredients used in the manufacture of street drugs, while popular items were sold on the black market to generate cash.
Changes had to be made to reduce shrinkage and the plan for the perfume case was to move all of it to the front of the store, on the shelving behind the tills.
Sometimes life has to become intolerable before I am willing to make changes. It was so bad that I was hearing impaired with the fluid build up in my right ear yet, I was still only flirting with the idea of quitting. Fortunately the decision was made easy for me in the end. My boss wanted to change my part-time status to full-time. Talk about a shove off the end of the pier.
It was a blessing in disguise. I found a better job, in a fragrance free zone.
The last couple of years an unidentified agent has rendered me hearing impaired for a few weeks in November. I guess quitting a job won’t be the easy solution to the problem this time.
Stanley was close to home and anxious to get there. For once he knew the answer. It was time for the daily Trivia contest on his favorite radio station. Finally, after so many weeks of trying he was the first caller through to know the answer. Yes!
Not only that, but the prize was a large two topping pizza from his favorite restaurant. He paid extra for an up-grade. He wanted this special pizza to include all of his favorite toppings.
It smelled so good. He was drooling and his stomach was already rumbling. He could hardly wait.
Somehow he had to sneak into the house without his little brothers noticing. It’s not often he ever wins anything and he wanted to savor the experience. If they catch even a glimpse there won’t be much left for him.
He was almost in the house when he heard squeals. PIZZA! He was pretty sure there were more than two sets of feet running toward him. Yup. He was surround by not two but four little boys jumping up and down with excited anticipation.
That right there was the whole trouble with winning.
The minute they notice, everyone within a three mile radius wants a piece of the pie.
For the Love of Books 