Detransitioning is a thing January 09, 2023

Detranistioners are speaking out. Their stories are horrific.

One young woman has accepted a number of interview invitations and it’s heart breaking listening to the way things have turned out for her.

One of the best interviews I’ve heard so far is with Jordan Peterson, a clinical psychologist. Not only is he able to ask intelligent and respectful questions to draw out her story but he is able to provide relevant information and explanations for questions coming to mind for both the young woman and the audience.

There is so much more I can think to say but hearing the interview would be a better way to go.

One other interview that I would rate in second place for the interviews I’ve heard so far is with Glenn Beck. His interview was also compassionate and thoughtful. He is not a doctor, that’s why Jordan Peterson has the advantage.

Heart breaking, is all I can say.

There are others in the same position but Chloe is the one I’ve watched so far.

I was talking to my daughter about this whole subject the other day, in relation to my grandson’s high school. She tells me the subject is prevalent in our schools already. And like everywhere else neither parents nor the conflicted young people are not being given the full picture about the real risks and consequences of the drugs and radical surgeries.

The saddest thing for me was when Chloe said that if she had known the risks involved with this treatment, she would never have said yes to what the health professionals wanted to do for her.

She was twelve when she first started down this path.

Now, still a teenager, Chloe wants to tell her story to save others from what her life has become.

It sounds like handling these treatments as an adult is less traumatic but not necessarily by much.

My own observation was that the consequence discussion was graphic, very personal, and unexpectedly surprising. I would never have dreamed what would rise up to be a problem for her.

I hope many of you will watch this and pass it on to spare others who may be in the position of making a decision without benefit of knowing the real risks.

A PTSD conversation December 19, 2022

The conversation in my head tonight is the aftermath of a telephone call with an old friend this afternoon We have been through deep waters together and now we were updating each other on our current lives.

Both of us lived through relationships with sex addicts. Our main experiences were different. Mine was originally from childhood, her’s all from adulthood. The men were out of control, we had that in common.

I’ve spent the evening attempting to find access to books I’ve found helpful over the years and they seem to have disappeared.

One book was the personal story of someone living with a man addicted to pornography. His addiction was a secret but as it grew larger in his life that all changed. It was helpful to hear her findings about the start, the source, and the pathway to deep destructive patterns in a relationship.

That’s where our conversation was today. How does it start? Why does it start? From sources I’ve found, it can start at a very early age if material is available. The reason it will take hold is to fill an emotional need. Loneliness for one. It acts as a pain reliever and it is highly addictive to the unsuspecting.

One book I found helpful in the beginning of my search for help understanding seems to be out of print and I’m sad. I wanted to send the link for this book to my friend.

I can find a link on Amazon for the paperback which is unavailable and it appears a Kindle edition hasn’t been created.

I have other books that address this addiction too but I wanted this one. Oh well, I’ve started reading it again to refresh my memory maybe I can share useful bites with her.

Laurie Hall’s story reveals pornography’s subversive side and offers comfort, encouragement, insight, and a plan of action to women whose husbands are addicted.

There is so much more to think and say but we’ll leave it there for tonight

**********************

On a different note . . .

There were no good book suggestions today. Maybe tomorrow.

Bargain books November 28, 2022

We have more exciting book suggestions today. Actually, a few were from yesterday but my email is wonky somehow and several did not show up in a timely manner. Better late than never though. Especially since they do have something we want.

BookRunes has the good suggestion for us this time. With an author is new to us. I’m loving her engaging writing style as I read through the sample. The last new author had a story line centered around big gang activity, it sounds like today’s story is in the same vein. Definitely a new twist compared to what we are used to seeing.

Withered Rose

What happens when a Christian woman and a mafia boss fall in love? Their passion breeds chaos.

Rosa and Amory have no business getting involved with one another but they also have no choice. Rosa is Amory’s captive bride, kidnapped and forced to marry him as payment for her brother’s debt. All she wants is to live a life free of crime and violence but now she’s shackled to the most dangerous man in New York City. Only God can help her now.

Meanwhile, Amory is looking forward to having a beautiful young bride. But Amory is a mafia underboss and Rosa is a Christian woman. Her faith is standing right between them, and he hates that. The sting of her refusal to marry him runs deep. But something in Amory feels drawn to Rosa, despite their differences.
Maybe she is the calm to his storm, maybe he is the chaos she secretly craves. Whatever the case, they’re in it together.

*****DISCLAIMER/WARNING*****

Withered Rose is a Christian story. There is no foul language and no graphic scenes of sex, violence, or gore. However, our characters are members of the mafia which may present an environment some readers consider triggering. Topics such as gang violence, abuse, and distribution of illegal substances will be introduced throughout the book.

**********************

Searching for this book there were others by this author. One of them was also a bargain and looked interesting so I think we will go for it too. It is in the same series but set many years later and is a stand alone story. It will be safe to read it without reading the rest of the series first.

Fractured Diamond: A Christian Romantic Suspense Novel (Withered Rose) 

Christian Romantic Suspense
Standalone Novel


After a vicious attack leaves Brianna Gem paranoid, she decides to hire private security. Little does she know, the man she hires is none other than Bobby Ackard, her high school sweetheart.

It’s been six years since Bobby dumped Brianna—now he’ll be following her around everywhere she goes. Protecting her.

Neither Brianna nor Bobby are kids anymore, but Bobby’s still got those piercing blue eyes and that dangerous smile. Absolutely nothing about him has changed but everything is different about Bri—and how could it not be? The last time Brianna saw her ex, they were madly in love. Then she found herself suddenly abandoned and drowning in rumors about her boyfriend. He was at the center of a police investigation before he dumped her and vanished six years ago. Now he’s back, but with his arrival comes a new load of drama and mystery.

Is it possible that Bobby isn’t the man Brianna thought he was? Could he be tied to the dangerous gangs of New York? Did he have something to do with the attack that led to their reunion?

Maybe Bobby’s untimely return is just a chance encounter. It might even be a gift from God so they can finally clear the air. Brianna has been targeted more than once. Her life could very well be in danger and Bobby could be her saving grace. But as Brianna gets to know him again and begins to peel back the layers covering the secret of his disappearance six years ago, she starts to wonder if their connection is a coincidence or a curse.

Fractured Diamond is a standalone novel that takes place ten years after the Withered Rose trilogy. While some characters from its prequel series do make an appearance throughout the novel, the storyline is unrelated and can be enjoyed without reading Withered Rose.

***WARNING***
Due to gang-related activity, this book is recommended for adult readers

**************************

There were other emails with suggestions but nothing showed up that could compare to the books we have already. Mostly same old same old.

I’ve read and enjoyed two books we downloaded the other day, with similar stories, and now I’m looking forward to the two new ones.

I’m also looking forward to book three in the first series to see how it all ends. Book 2 ended with a big cliff hanger.

*************************

One thing that stood out starkly for me in the series was this: things that look exciting and pleasurable have an unexpected dark side.

There was a brothel connected to the gang’s very large drug operation. The women were beautiful. The men were distracted with unquenchable lust. They “loved” the same woman but weren’t necessarily aware of the truth of the situation. The unexpected dark side was jealousy, murder, and betrayal. They thought they had it all but there were no winners in this game.

A vivid portrayal of real life I’m thinking.

**********************

Tough stuff but a good read none the less

Happy Reading y’all

PTSD Conversation. November 21, 2022

Our body remembers and keeps track. This is a recently acquired piece of information that explains a whole lot of things for me.

Memory suppression is a coping mechanism our minds will use to help us survive life. That has been the truth of my formative years. I have to be intentional about allowing snippets of information to settle in my mind long enough to consider what they might mean. Doing this has been an enlightening experience and explained may things, but it didn’t start happening until I was willing to allow my mind to dwell on the visiting thoughts.

For many decades I refused to entertain the idea of abuse precisely because I had no concrete memories. I suspected but wouldn’t make an accusation I couldn’t prove. A decade or so ago my brother forced me to admit it was true. He used persuasive force so it was all good. I think he remembers more than he was willing to admit. His assertion came out of nowhere although I think he must have been thinking about it for quite some time. It was like he was on a mission to finally talk about it and now was the time.

So back to the body remembering thought. . . It’s kind of funny when I think about it because I have been on a quest for emotional healing for many decades. That would be proof of the body remembers where my mind doesn’t. Subconsciously I knew I had a deep need for healing in my life and over the years I’ve been driven to pursue it relentlessly. The motivation was I want to be well.

It’s something how books, conversations, lectures, stories, all sorts of things, cross my path just when I need them.

Like I said the body remembers concept showed up in the last year or so and it was so helpful. I had been paying attention before but now I was more intentional. Besides noticing physical responses, fight or flight, I started thinking more deeply about the reasons and implications of those reactions. I’ve known forever than I don’t have normal reactions or even interpretations to words or situations, but I want to.

The latest idea for me to explore builds on the last one. Your body remembers and is convinced that danger still exists and raises the alarm to protect you. That’s why we are triggered by anything remotely resembling past dangerous situations. I have many triggers and have yet to figure out what is behind most of them. There are so many because the worst of the abuse stretched over a decade and on top of that there were multiple people involved as well as multiple types of abuse. Both emotional and physical. Then there is the complication that the emotional abuse continued on much longer than a decade.

The idea today was that, to get past these reactions we have to face our triggers/fears, convince our internal memory that all is well and the danger is past. And mostly it is, that’s true.

For a while I have been thinking about changing thought patterns by laying down new memories over the old. Creating new neural pathways. I’ve been thinking about facing and figuring out what caused the triggers in order to understand the why of the triggers, by knowing what happened to me. Understanding what is behind the triggers helps us chase away the proverbial bogey man hiding under the bed or in the closet.

I can see now that finding a way to convince my body that the danger is past and I’m safe, is badly needed.

Easier said than done. But worth a try.

Today’s moment of revelation came in the form of a podcast. It was a valuable conversation between professionals, a clinical psychologist and a popular guest with several degrees in the mental health field. These two come at the conversation from different perspectives and it has given me food for thought that will be around for some time to come.

One more much needed building block on the journey.

Here is the link. They had so much more to say that is worth hearing.

https://youtu.be/B_373YVlnDA

Among many others they talked about answering the question – What do you want? a serious question that most of us cannot articulate. Possibly because no one has ever asked us that question. At least not in a serious, really wanting to know, kind of way. It’s usually more like – what do You want? That’s the first thought that popped into my head as I wrote the first question. Sad. Probably heard that version a lot as a kid.

I have to say they covered a lot of ground in the hour long podcast.

Anyway, their enlightening conversation was definitely worth the time.

Until next time

Hope this makes sense, didn’t leave enough time for needed rewrites.

Free book November 06, 2022

Sunday is a slow day for book suggestions but we do have one that could be interesting. The authors are new to me and they are still new to having books published it seems, the selection is still small. One thing they do have in their favorite is their impressive involvement in the publishing industry. Editing is in their resume and I know they will be making sure their books are well taken care of in that department. I wish I could say the same thing about my current read where the editing is hit and miss and leaves much to be desired. At least the story is well thought out.

So back to BookRunes free suggestion. This is a published series with three books and we have the first one.

Picture Imperfect (Roseville Romances Book 1) 

Can a struggling career woman and a procrastinating artist save a beloved nonprofit?Aspiring novelist Caroline Penn expected a promotion, not a picture book assignment. But when her employer, the non-profit Helping Hope, runs into financial trouble, this book might be the solution. With the company struggling to stay afloat, she and the illustrator will need to collaborate on a strict deadline—no problem for a workaholic like Caroline, right?

Andy Jackson, a “starving” artist, pays the bills by taking on graphic design gigs, but his perfectionism gets in the way. If only he could focus on a project for once, perhaps he could achieve his dream to make art for children for a living.

When the two are thrust together to create a book, Caroline can’t seem to write for children, and Andy can’t meet a deadline to save his life. As time ticks down to release day, the two must face their pasts and insecurities. If they can avoid strangling one another for long enough, they may just bring to the table what the other is missing.

If not, the fate of their careers—and a beloved nonprofit—hangs in the balance.

**************************

That’s all there is for now but I will keep my eyes open just in case.

*****************

I have two current reads. . . half way through each of them. I’m enjoying the stories but I’m not sure what happened here.

The problem with the first one is sloppy editing. Much of the book, so far, is well edited, it’s the sections with no discernible editing that are derailing the reader’s connection to the story. Could it be that the polished version was not the one published? Certainly seems possible.

The second story is a good read, as usual for this author, but there are some triggering sections that have me taking a break.

I will finish them both in time, never fear.

**********************

It’s a cloudy day with cool temperatures, a perfect day to curl up with a warm drink. a good book, and a cozy blanket

Happy Reading y’all

Free book October 28, 2022

This is interesting. BookRunes brought us this suggestion.This is the first time we’ve crossed paths with this author and her story description is unique. Checking out the warnings at the bottom this blurb, this book does not sound anything like our usual reads in a number of ways. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. Sometimes a story like this helps us see the real world and the horror that victims are forced to live through. Some of us may find this triggering. That was not mentioned in the warning but maybe it should be. Read carefully.

The Woof Pack

BOOK ONE in The Woof Pack Trilogy
A Christian Romantic Suspense Series


It’s just a regular evening when Iyana’s neighbors ask her to babysit their dog. Everything seems fine until two masked men enter the apartment without an invitation.
At first, Iyana thinks they’ve come to steal the dog—she’d heard of a string of break-ins in the community by a group called The Woof Pack. But when these thugs overpower her and drag her away, she realizes they’re not pup-loving enthusiasts at all.

A case of mistaken identity gets Iyana taken in by one of the deadliest gangs in New York. Now, she has seen their faces and has learned their names; even though they know they’ve got the wrong girl, they aren’t going to let her go.
Fortunately, Iyana is a smart woman. She strikes a deal with the leader of the gang … they’ll let her live as long as she makes herself useful. But Iyana is just a naive Christian girl babysitting an innocent pup. What can she offer the most dangerous man in the city?

She knows exactly what he wants. She can tell from the way he looks at her, the way his eyes linger when she catches him staring. But she’s not willing to give him that. Anything but that.
The Woof Pack have taken her hostage; they’ve taken her mind, body, and her will. But she won’t let them have her heart.

If only Vito Gerardo were that easy to resist.

***WARNING***
This book is a work of Christian fiction: there is no foul language, and no graphic scenes of violence, sex, or gore. Due to content involving gang activity and hostage situations, this series is recommended for mature audiences ages 17+

*************************

1531 Entertainment has a bargain suggestion.

One Little Lie (The Pelican Harbor Series Book 1) 

It started with one little lie. But Jane Hardy will do everything in her power to uncover the truth in this gripping romantic suspense.

Jane Hardy is appointed interim sheriff in Pelican Harbor, Alabama, after her father retires, but there’s no time for an adjustment period. When her father is arrested for theft and then implicated in a recent murder, Jane quickly realizes someone is attempting to destroy the only family she has.

After escaping with her father from a cult fifteen years ago, Jane has searched relentlessly for her mother—who refused to leave—ever since. Could someone from that horrible past have found them?

Reid Dixon is well-known for his documentaries, and his latest project involves covering Jane’s career. Jane has little interest in the attention, but the committee who appointed her loves the idea of the publicity.

Jane finds herself depending on Reid’s calm manner as he follows her around filming, and they begin working together to clear her father. But Reid has his own secrets from the past, and the gulf between them may be impossible to cross—especially once her father’s lie catches up with him.

**********************

Two complex stories, how awesome is that?

Happy Reading y’all

Free book and current read July 05, 2022

BookRunes has a FREE suggestion for us, this will be our second exposure to this author. The beginning looks interesting. Interesting is good.

Back in the day women doctors were not well accepted and while graduating at the top of the class it wasn’t enough for our heroine to be given the hospital position she dreamed of. Deeply disappointed, she is on her way home trying to figure out what comes next.

With attitudes like they are it promises to be an interesting ride.

The Way to Healing: The Waymaker series Book 1

After their first meeting, Edith “Edie” Carmichael would have been content to never lay eyes on Lucas Brown again.

She thinks he’s no more than the grumpy owner of Pine Creek’s lumber company, and he thinks she’s a know-it-all lady doctor intent on putting folks in their place.

The two must quickly form a truce when suspicious accidents and theft at the sawmill threaten both his livelihood and the lives of his men, but can Lucas ever learn to trust a woman after a lifetime of being abandoned by them? Can Edie be content running the clinic in the hometown she thinks she’s outgrown, or will her dreams prove more powerful than her growing feelings? And when the world around them goes up in flames, will Edie and Lucas make it out alive?

************************

That’s it for today.

I’ll share my current read. This one fell through the cracks, it joined my library in 2012 but this is my first time reading it. It is a dark but timely subject, presented with hope. I think I placed it on the back burner worried about triggers. It is turning out to be handled in a truthful and careful way which is much appreciated.

Saving Hope (The Men of the Texas Rangers Book 1) 

When a teenager goes missing from the Beacon of Hope School, Texas Ranger Wyatt Sheridan and school director Kate Winslow are forced into a dangerous struggle against a human trafficking organization. But the battle brings dire consequences as Wyatt’s daughter is terrorized and Kate is kidnapped.

Now it’s personal, and Wyatt finds both his faith and investigative skills challenged as he fights to discover the mastermind behind the ring before evil destroys everyone he loves.

************************

It has been a warm one today. A good day to read and cool down a bit.

Happy Reading y’all

Current read June 25, 2022, finished – 26th

I’ve figured some things out. Charles Martin is one of my top five favorite authors. There is such depth to his stories. They are real, emotional, and complex. Pretty much like real life. It’s impossible to walk away unchanged after reading one of his books. But…

Despite loving his characters and the life they live there were often uncomfortable moments in the reading that puzzled me. I figured it was something about his style, or the fact that he is a male and I’m not. Everyone knows men are from Mars and women are from Venus. We hear the same words while receiving different messages.

Charles would craft intricately detailed descriptions and explanations that left me confused. Frustrating.

Today an enlightening new thought occurred to me. With further consideration I’ve decided maybe his writing style is not the problem. Maybe it’s my reading style. I’ve gotten used to reading books at 60 miles an hour (figuratively speaking) without missing anything important. Sometimes even skipping whole paragraphs, pages, or even chapters without losing much of the story.

That’s the problem. Speed without much effort. Many of his paragraphs need to have a slow-to-20 sign posted at the entrance.

As I continued through the book I had to admit there was still truth in other contributing issues like male/female thought patterns and lack of subject knowledge on things like places (Florida Everglades) and technical discussions (machines and fishing flies.) Still, the bulk of my confusion would probably be eliminated with slow down.

Sadly, It’s finished.

There is always a sense of loss when such a great story comes to an end.

It has been a few years since I first read this book and it was a shock to discover how little I remembered of the story.

It probably seemed to me like I should remember more because the title has appeared often through the years and since it was marked as read…

The upside of not remembering is the chance for the joy of a first time experience all over again.

I have to say it brightened my weekend.

If you’ve not read Charles Martin, you should. It is always an amazing experience.

I should have posted this on the 25th but I was reading, not paying attention to time, midnight came and went before I noticed. Since it was already the 26th I figured I may as well finish the book first, I was hoping for a good quote to demonstrate my confusion point. There was a perfect one early on but I had read past it, losing sight of it’s location. I was hoping to come across another good one but I guess the new awareness worked against that happening.

Anyway, on to a new story. Haven’t decided what that should be yet. It’ll be a surprise.

Bargain Book June 22, 2022

An awesome book from an awesome author is on sale at a bargain price again. Charles Martin brings some of his books back every year or two for a few days. The first time I noticed this book was 2016 and every time after I remember how much I loved it.

Wrapped in Rain: A Novel

An internationally famous photographer, Tucker Mason has traveled the world, capturing things other people don’t see. But what Tucker can’t see is how to let go of his traumatic childhood and forgive his father.

On a sprawling Southern estate, Tucker and his younger brother, Mutt, were raised by their housekeeper, Miss Ella Rain, who loved the motherless boys like her own. Hiring her to take care of Waverly Hall and the boys was the only good thing their abusive and alcoholic father ever did.

When his brother escapes from a mental hospital and an old girlfriend appears with her son and a black eye, Tucker is forced to return home and face the agony of his tragic past.

Though Miss Ella has been gone for many years, Tucker can still hear her voice—and her prayers. “Life is a battle, but you can’t fight it with your fists. You got to fight it with your heart.” But finding peace and starting anew will take a measure of grace that Tucker scarcely believes in.

Wrapped in Rain follows Tucker’s journey from brokenness to healing through the everlasting power of love.

**********************

As a general rule, we have a tendency to underestimate the power of love.

As I read this synopsis, I can see I need to read this book again too.

The new cover is beautiful.

Free and bargain books June 06, 2022

Playing catch up again on great book suggestions.

1531 Entertainment has several suggestions for us.

The River Beautiful by Andrea Carmen

A difficult past. A strange letter. An unsolved mystery.

Someone is following Lena, mapping her every move.

Where strength can be weakness and vulnerability-an asset, the greatest danger that threatens Lena may just be herself.

After the death of her father years ago, Lena ran from the quiet community of Kennerdell, but she’s back, forced to face a past she’d rather forget.

To make things more difficult, awkward, and terrifying, her old friend, Will, is back in her life. Even worse, she needs him there if she hopes to figure out what the letter she found in her father’s study means. They’re on a mission to find answers before her stalker does.

The River Beautiful mingles history and legend in a fast-paced ride through the deceptively peaceful Allegheny Mountains on a quest for answers amid loss, strength in the face of love, a whirlwind of self-discovery, and learning to use faith to illuminate even the darkest places.

I will admit to downloading this book several years ago and not reading it. Probably the darkness of the story was the stumbling block. Maybe I should try again, just in case now is a better time.

*****************

This next one is another downloaded book I’ve not read. I have read and enjoyed other Ted Dekker books though. His books chart as Science Fiction and Metaphysical Fantasy.

Black (Circle Book 1)

Thomas Hunter narrowly survives a shooting attempt only to awaken in an alternate universe of green forests, a world to which he subsequently travels every time he goes to sleep.

This is the short version of a synopsis. The longer one is… long… and wild.

Check it out. He is on a quest to save the world. Both of them.

*********************

Changing the subject totally…

BookRunes has a suggestion I have read and enjoyed.

Red Rose Bouquet: (Grace Revealed Book 2)

Cheryl Thompson learned over a decade ago to guard her shattered heart with a veil of cold indifference. Life since that day has been an endless cycle of detachment and loneliness, followed by superficial relationships. Break up, rinse, and repeat. Until something in her snaps. This life…she can’t do it anymore. She returns to her childhood home in the Colorado Rockies to help her nana.

Brock Kelly lived high as King of the Slopes in the world of snowboard cross racing. Medals. Money. Fame. But after a visit to an orphanage in Mexico, he gave up his adrenaline-packed lifestyle to follow a calling from God he didn’t know he had—helping kids who’d been damaged emotionally.

When Cheryl finally tells Brock what she’s never told anyone else…no wonder she is the way she is. It would take a miracle to heal that wound, and a love bigger than Brock had ever imagined to walk with her through the process.

**********************

I think there could be more but that will have to be a new post.

Happy Reading y’all…

Although, with this lot it may be more tense than happy.

Tense can be good though… right?